discuss Last names

[Oshawott]

In my country (rather, maybe the world over), there is this idea of changing the last name of your wife to that of the first name of your husband. Many couples have come against this practice of tagging a female with a male partmer for no reason and has chosen to not do this renaming.

What are your thoughts on it?

I am one of those husbands who has refused to rename a part of my wife's fullname and add my name into it.

 

[Reelz]

Let me tell you, it depends on where you are from. In my home country, it is mandatory for a woman to change her last name to her husband's immediately after they are married. It is compulsory for her to do so except they are not legally married.

 

[MamaFrankie]

In Britain and Ireland, the usual practice is for the wife to take her husband's surname on marriage. However, it is not and never has been a legal requirement, just tradition. Personally, I don't see why a wife should have to take his name. Just another example of the patriarchy calling the shots.

 

[Cpvr]

In Britain and Ireland, the usual practice is for the wife to take her husband's surname on marriage. However, it is not and never has been a legal requirement, just tradition. Personally, I don't see why a wife should have to take his name. Just another example of the patriarchy calling the shots.

It’s the same way here as well. Generally speaking, the wife takes her husband’s last name.

 

[Oshawott]

Let me tell you, it depends on where you are from. In my home country, it is mandatory for a woman to change her last name to her husband's immediately after they are married. It is compulsory for her to do so except they are not legally married.

When you say mandatory, where and how is it mandated?

Is it mandated by law or is it the prevailing social custom? How is it enforced?

 

[Shawn]

Definitely not mandatory in America. It's common practice, though. My wife took my last name. I could had taken her if I wanted to though but that is a rare thing for the male to do, aside from maybe in a gay marriage type scenario.

Had my wife wanted to keep her maiden name, I wouldn't have objected.

Now I call her Gooseman which is what when has called me over the years LOL

 

[King Belieal]

In my culture, it is the man that is given a list to pay just to marry the woman. That is the rationale behind the woman having to change her last names to that of her husband's n. The man is expected to be her protector, her provider, her guardian. Why not take his last name?

 

[Apsara]

The tradition of a woman taking her husband’s last name is rooted in patriarchal systems where women were seen as extensions of their husbands, not individuals with independent legal or social identities.

Today, many people are questioning this norm, and rightly so. Choosing to keep your own name, hyphenate, or even create a new family name together is an empowering decision that reflects mutual respect and modern values. Personally, I think names carry history, emotion, and identity, so it makes perfect sense for couples to do what feels authentic for both individuals, not just follow tradition for tradition’s sake. What matters most is that the choice is freely made and meaningful to the couple, not imposed by society.

 

[Shortie]

I can't say I have ever known anyone to take their husbands first name and added it to their name after marriage, but I could see how it may be something that is a requirement in some countries.

In the UK, it is common for the woman to take the man's surname, but it is not law or required and she can either keep her surname or even have her husband change his surname to her surname.

 

[Yama]

In my place, taking husband's first name is rare. In fact I have never heard of any woman who has officially taken her husband's first name. However, taking last name is very common. By the way, when I married, I did not ask my wife to take my last name. She uses her maiden name every where, even in the official document.